FAMILY GATHERINGS AND BOOZE.

I don’t know about you but there’s just something about family gatherings that is quite intriguing. The sole purpose is to keep us close and enhance bonding which is very nonexistent nowadays due to everyday hustles. Looking at it however, this is exactly the opposite. It more often than not tends to bring division among the members of the family. Actually, these gatherings are more of a showing and measuring field of where the members compare themselves and their progress over their last encounter. I’ve always wondered what all the smiles were all about. Sorry to break it to you but most of these smiles are fabrications.

Think about that uncle who you would mistake to be the popular dealfish or even the East African newspaper since he claims to be the sealer of all deals. Add a bit of alcohol and he swears how he was having dinner with the prime minister the previous night. More and more he goes ahead to state how the president pays him a courtesy call every now and then just to check up on him. How unfortunate that his pair of socks always end up selling him out. They have all manner of air spaces that always leave us with unanswered questions. All in all, we still love you.

Then there’s that uncle whom everybody seems to love. His sense of humour is quite amazing since he always knows the right things to say. He always sits at the far corner and everything seems alright until it’s time to binge. I could swear his eyes tend to pop out of their sockets and his legs can’t help but shake. We all know how that ends up. As I remember last time, he ended up calling my aunt’s friend “momo” and further going ahead to compare her to his favourite freshian cow, Tiebae. We all know about women and weight issues so I’ll say no more.

Then there’s the sadist distant cousin who was not even invited but who sees others as a bunch of buffoons. He’s so full of it always stating how everybody should emulate him. He imagines that he has it all from class to a fat wallet which nobody can come close to. He always keeps that sadistic smile when everything goes haywire claiming that everybody in the family is a drunk who needs saving from the most high. I hate it when I have to listen to his constant encouragements but deep down you can see him wishing you were a failure.  He’s not that perfect after all since everybody knows his wife recently left him.

We can’t leave out the women in the family who insist on being ambassadors of our lord Jesus but can’t seem to put their wine glasses down.  Give them the eye and they start giving you the wine is good for your health speech. Furthermore, it’s not comparable to other forms of liquor. Come to think of it however, wine contains more alcohol than even beer but that’s a story for another day. All In all, we still remain family. It’s what you get when blood brings you together. So until next family gathering, see ya!!