I OFFICIALLY HATE FIVE STAR HOTELS

Officially my first day in a five star hotel and evrything seemed to be going on so well for at least most of the time. I was eventually faced with satchet containing six grams of sugar and everything changed. It doesn't cease to amaze me how such a minute thing could be so detrimental. Its one of those opportunities that come once in a corruption free Kenya and it's all courtesy of a relative. I hope for a moment there you didn't think that I was feeling kind of philanthrophic and decided to spare a few bucks? Anyway back to the main thesis. My distant uncle whom I don't get to see as often as KPLC'S power outages heard I was looking for an attachment and so he decided to give a helping hand. He invited me to Laico regency where he's a cordinator of some sort.

It's already mid morning and I dress up ready for the big day. A casual shirt and jeans is the order of the day and within thirty minutes I was at the entrance of the magnificient hotel. I should have realised at this moment it was not going to end up so well as I stood there waiting to be frisked. It was so embarassing when the guard ushered me in with a smile on her face. It was obvious she realised it was my first time. As I entered, I couldn't help but notice the suv's in the parking lot demonstrating the social gap in our country. Again a story for another day.

After conducting the main agenda in the office, the moment I had been waiting for was finally here with us. It's a hotel and not an office so a cup of tea was in order. It was much justified but I bet judge Bosire would highly disagree. Justice doesn't quite augur well with him at the moment. Summit is the place and now its between me, the waiter and the menu. The hospitality is spectacular by the way but the menu seems to have other intentions. I make my order and there she is; placed in an exotic glass together with her bitter cousin the salt. She seems to be the link between me and having a wonderful time and she makes sure the opposite happens.

After throwing gazes all over, I decide to deep the satchet in the cappuccino assuming that it dissolves like the normal tea bag and after stirring for a while, this doesn't prove to be the case. The taste is pathetic and now confusion gets the better part of me. Maybe I didn't stir enough I say to myself and decide to do it all over again. A bit harder this time. Now the mug decides to make certain noises which happen to draw some attention and I stop. Nothing seems to have changed. "Gosh!" I whisper to myself. Maybe I should just take it sugarless. In that heated moment of high contemplaton, an old bloke on the other table happened to be taking cappuccino too and I observed keenly as he took the satchet and teared it. Yeah, it's that simple.

I have never felt so mortified in my life and this really scarred me for good. I am now officially fivestarphobic if there's such a recorded phobia. It pains even more when I think about the hot waitress who served me and whom unforturtunately I was trying very hard to impress.